Anger Management

[Diane J Ackerman]

As a new member to your site I'd like to introduce myself I am Diane Ackerman from Tavares Florida I own and operate ALternate Pathways Outreach a 501c3 organization that offers life skills educatioin to at risk adults and adolescents to those who are seeking positive changes in their lives. You can check me out on my web site www.alternatepathways.com I'm open for questions concerning anger issues or conflect resolution. for private sessions call me at 352-343-3380 This is a court approved program payment is on a sliding scale according to income.

[Debra J. Berg]

Diane, I appreciate your adding to the discussion forum on this topic because I think it is a fundamental issue in so many of the problems we address throughout the human serivces arena. People are so often bad at dealing with anger, youth are seldom taught how to approach and grapple with it and yet it comes out in very destructive ways at school. Have you had experience working with educators in schools concerning anger and violence? Do you find them open to the topic? Or do you prefer to work more one-on-one with families and individuals? Maybe you could also shed light on the warning signs in a person of potential violence resulting from their anger.

[Diane J Ackerman]

You're right anger has become a large part of our lives today especially because of the current economic situation. I do work with young adults from teen court. However, I have not as yet worked in the schools, I am open to making myself available once the school year begins. I'm working on that. So in answer to your question I don't know if they are open or not but I'm about to find out. The important thing to remember is that people were not born angry. Also anger is not a bad emotion it is how one reacts or acts out with their anger. it's a learned behavior. What I focus on is being happy and proactive in ones responsibility and accountability for their actions. As far as warning signs, well I would say be cautions and respectful of the silent one. When asking what is wrong respect the persons privacy and give them time to process their thoughts. If the silence goes on for a long period of time them you might start asking questions. Be mindful of the questions though. If you see the person getting uncomfortable ask permission to go further. If the person is not in the mood to talk honor their feelings and respectfully give them time. Always leaving the door open for discussion at a later date. It is also important to remember that teens are people to and although our opinions may differ we have an option to agree to disagree. We may lose a few battles but we with the right communication we can win the war.

[Jerry Rudoff]

Hi...
For discussion purpose, I'd like to take issue with your statement that 'anger' is a result of our economic environment and that our focus should be on being happy... proactive yes... First let me quality... one's economic situation can certainly effect one's feelings either negative or positive depending on their personal situation. But in general how do you explain the fact that when our parents and their parents came up, they had to deal with economic times that we as a society haven't seen since even considering the scope of the latest down turn and other than a person or two jumping off a building due to the depression, the level of anger as judged by the lesser numbers of violent crimes during that time has been markedly different? Do you believe that anger is a symptom of a great of a great problem or an emotion in and of itself? And to the question of focusing on being happy... Yes, it would certainly be nice we could all be happy all of the time but that is being realistic or pragmatic... Beside does one's mood necessarily affect one's level of anger? I don't think so as one can be sad and not necessarily angry, right? Yes, I do realize that I'm playing with words here but it does make for an interesting discussion... take care..jerry

[Diane J Ackerman]

Of course the economy isn't the main cause for anger perhaps you misunderstood my message. I will attempt to clerify myself. The economy today is one of the major causes for disharmony in the home and at the workplace. People are in fear of losing their jobs and/ or businesses. Families are having to cut back drastically on activities that were once considered necessities, and are now considered luxuries. We are a spoiled society and for the most part we don't like the cut backs that are becoming a new way of life and thinking. When I said be happy I was not viewing life for a pair of rose colored glasses. Most people including myself are very much aware of the down side of anger and if we choose to take a negative stand we can wallow in our opinions. However, if we approach our anger pro-actively by change our paradigm . We may just find a peaceful solution to what very well may have been a problem taken personally. And yes, one mood does necessarily affect one's level of anger. I'm sure at some point in time you've gotten up on the wrong side of the bed. Everyone has if you choose to carry that "bad mood" with you throughout the day it will affect everything you do for that day. However, if we choose to dump that bad mood like we do our morning bowel movement our thinking will change and our entire body and mind will be cleansed. Thank you Jerry I enjoyed sharing with you. I'd like to invite you to our drum circle on the 20th of August at 6:30 pm. it's a great way to meet people and release stress.

[Jerry Rudoff]

I must really apologize for not responding sooner as I just got side tracked with other related things... I liked your analogy of the morning cleansing....... No wonder I'm so happy! jerry